So. I dislike skunks, for reasons obvious to anyone’s olfactory organs… and yesterday I was 3 feet away from being pungently offensive to everyone at the office. Luckily, I have Star Trek like reflexes and I teleported myself 20 feet away in a matter of seconds. Ok, I didn’t teleport, but I have not moved that quickly in a long while and my hamstrings are an acute witness to that fact today.

This encounter was after two (yes, 2) storms rolled through Oklahoma City, one from 11pm – 1pm and the other 5am-10am… it was a damp and thunderous night and morning allowing me about 4 hours of sleep. Not to mention the ground was so wet and muddy that I got my car stuck. Imagine this – me in gym shorts and a rain coat, stuffing branches under my muddy tire, in the middle of a downpour, with mud covering my car, legs, hands and feet. It was beautiful. I used the ol’ stuck in the snow trick of shifting from Drive to Reverse, gently rocking the car out of the tire ruts in the mud… I don’t even want to think of the damage I did to the automatic transmission during this ferocious back and forth shifting of the gears. Blah.

The good news of the morning: I didn’t get sprayed by a skunk, my tent didn’t leak in the rain, my car didn’t stay stuck in the mud, and I didn’t cuss even once (one of these is a lie).

[update]
This is fantastic… A friend emailed a home remedy to getting rid of skunks, not using any chemicals or pesticides:

YO Sam,

So here is my “secret” to skunk elimination. Sounds like you can use it:

Spoon of tuna fish (or cat food), spoon of peanut butter, handful of chocolate chips (more chocolate the better). Mix all together. (No, you can’t eat this for dinner).

Put skunk casserole in a place near where skunks visit, but away from your tent. Skunks will eat every bite and return to their dens to die. Works every time.

Skunks love this stuff. Unfortunately for them chocolate is extremely toxic. It thins their blood and they die in their sleep usually in their dens. Just be careful if you look out and see that in retaliation skunks have placed a cup of hot coffee and a scone outside your tent. I wouldn’t fall for that trap.

Take care…..